I woke up one morning and realized that I had lost my voice. Not physically, but the more important one. My inner voice. Somehow I had forgotten who I was and what was important to me.

I had been working hard in financial services for twenty years. Started fresh from law school, bought a green suit (yes, it was the 90’s and green suits were cool back then…), put on high heels and worked long hours to learn and to prove myself. Lingered into product development during the first wave of digitalization as it was simply irresistible. We blazed the trail in re-thinking and re-creating everything. I ran projects, created strategies, products and built networks. Got myself a MBA, not the executive version but the real thing, while working through my first leadership role and second maternity leave. Grew into executive roles in leading banks and a supersonic challenger bank. Eagerly jumped into the second and third waves of digitalizing finance with a new generation of developers who would never wear a suit. Re-learned ways of leading, embraced agile and new tech. Built teams and organizations, transformed other. Started helping people and organizations as a mentor and advisor.

But there I was. Loving the content but acting on a plan that was not really mine. Trying to fit into a role that I started to find odd. Getting agitated about silly, petty issues. Found myself remembering the brown eyed girl in a green suit. And missing her. So I had to stop and take time to find my voice again. Go running, surfing and read a lot of books. Focus on my wellbeing. Alone time. Time with my sons.

I learned that my annoyance was mostly about being asked to “stay within the box” even when the goal was to create something new. And me trying to explain that there is no box…. Hence the name Apeiroga. Derived by me from a Greek word Apeiron meaning unlimited, boundless, infinite and somewhat a paradox. Embracing the freedom of thought including the unthinkable. Understanding that the essence of things can often be found in the intersections of forces that seem impossible to combine. Celebrating exceptional talent not bound to any single discipline. Good for people, good for business. Good for me.

This is the next phase of my story, the unlimited version... In jeans and boho dresses.